I Reflect


My confusion’s concise and my doubt is precise
I have been lucid, however, only once or twice
For this lifetime of omission I have paid a price

Taking this side first, then pining for the other
Always in hiding because I listened to my brother
No chance for comfort in the sanctuary of mother

I have cast off friends or was I always the port?
At one time I gave myself the moniker “the last resort”
Only with the faceless ones I allow myself to consort

My interests seem varied but the difference is nil
There is a lack of something I can’t seem to fulfill
A full space would end this chase, but it never will

She has been around in whatever place I have been
Would have her by now if I was a thousand other men
There was one but she is gone, never to be again

Self-delusion’s a fair conclusion, I reflect
Before the ivory bars, again, I begin to dissect
Building a box for this smoke is a lifelong project

3-11-03

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